Ditching alcohol
I recently completed 100 days alcohol free.
The experiment was prompted by a succession of particularly heavy nights (and vicious morning afters) last autumn. I noticed some things:
Why 100 days? A month off would be too short. I needed to fully drain the toxins from my system (which takes some time) and consolidate new social habits. I wasn't going to avoid boozy events. I would simply engage with them in a different way.
I read two books to bolster my chances:
I was inspired to rethink my attitude to sobriety from reading Catherine Gray's The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober. Gray, a recovering alcoholic rebrands sober as a visceral, lush state, rather than something austere and mundane.
As for my method, I used Allan Car's Easyway to Stop Drinking. Carr argues the best way to cut out drinking is to take apart the fallacies that underpin it. When drinking is seen for what it is, willpower is no longer necessary to abstain. It simply no longer makes sense.
My 100 days ran from October 27th 2019 until February 4th 2020.
Findings:
If there is one thing I could impress on others seeking to diminish/cut out their drinking, it is this: giving up is easy. You absolutely can do it. There may be a few wobbly nights early on, but your instinct to reach for a glass is quickly overwritten and your confidence compounds. There are people who have a vested interest in your believing it will not be easy (your mates, the drinks industry), but my experience was absolutely contrary to this view (helped in part by the convictions and method picked up in the books).
I slept better. I woke up feeling fresh and eager for a new day.
The early morning is a gift. And it's all yours. I wandered around serenely like I'd been born again.
I left social events earlier. The rule of thumb is: nothing good happens after 12/1am. Your mates get incoherent. The streets get a bit nasty (cracked bottles, frozen girls, raucous men, discarded kebabs). Best to shoot off home.
I was noticeably more on it mentally. In work and socially. I was picking up on social cues, retaining more information, thinking things out faster. My mood improved. My stress dissipated. I became more optimistic. I felt powerful.
I became more outwardly confident in social situations. Previously, I alternated between a stilted, strained gait in sobriety and boorish, drunken bluster once the booze flooded in. I found I was now calm, a better listener and conversationalist. Your initial apprehension melts. All that's left is you, the adult, who can handle it! I also noticed I was much more inclined to speak up in work meetings, and my presentations improved.
Twice I seemed to be coming down with whatever colds were going around over the Christmas period. My body simply shrugged them off in a day. I can't attribute this with certainty to my not drinking, but it certainly couldn't have been a hindrance being in better shape.
Overall, this experiment was utterly worthwhile and I can absolutely advocate it. I can't say I'll never drink again - but I can absolutely say I will never again drink at the rate I was. I'm not going back there. Things can be so much better.
The experiment was prompted by a succession of particularly heavy nights (and vicious morning afters) last autumn. I noticed some things:
- I didn't like who I was when drinking
- The hangovers were too much
- There is always that nagging sense that you are holding yourself back by boozing - curtailing your ability to bring your best self to your work and relationships
Why 100 days? A month off would be too short. I needed to fully drain the toxins from my system (which takes some time) and consolidate new social habits. I wasn't going to avoid boozy events. I would simply engage with them in a different way.
I read two books to bolster my chances:
I was inspired to rethink my attitude to sobriety from reading Catherine Gray's The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober. Gray, a recovering alcoholic rebrands sober as a visceral, lush state, rather than something austere and mundane.
As for my method, I used Allan Car's Easyway to Stop Drinking. Carr argues the best way to cut out drinking is to take apart the fallacies that underpin it. When drinking is seen for what it is, willpower is no longer necessary to abstain. It simply no longer makes sense.
My 100 days ran from October 27th 2019 until February 4th 2020.
Findings:
If there is one thing I could impress on others seeking to diminish/cut out their drinking, it is this: giving up is easy. You absolutely can do it. There may be a few wobbly nights early on, but your instinct to reach for a glass is quickly overwritten and your confidence compounds. There are people who have a vested interest in your believing it will not be easy (your mates, the drinks industry), but my experience was absolutely contrary to this view (helped in part by the convictions and method picked up in the books).
I slept better. I woke up feeling fresh and eager for a new day.
The early morning is a gift. And it's all yours. I wandered around serenely like I'd been born again.
I left social events earlier. The rule of thumb is: nothing good happens after 12/1am. Your mates get incoherent. The streets get a bit nasty (cracked bottles, frozen girls, raucous men, discarded kebabs). Best to shoot off home.
I was noticeably more on it mentally. In work and socially. I was picking up on social cues, retaining more information, thinking things out faster. My mood improved. My stress dissipated. I became more optimistic. I felt powerful.
I became more outwardly confident in social situations. Previously, I alternated between a stilted, strained gait in sobriety and boorish, drunken bluster once the booze flooded in. I found I was now calm, a better listener and conversationalist. Your initial apprehension melts. All that's left is you, the adult, who can handle it! I also noticed I was much more inclined to speak up in work meetings, and my presentations improved.
Twice I seemed to be coming down with whatever colds were going around over the Christmas period. My body simply shrugged them off in a day. I can't attribute this with certainty to my not drinking, but it certainly couldn't have been a hindrance being in better shape.
Overall, this experiment was utterly worthwhile and I can absolutely advocate it. I can't say I'll never drink again - but I can absolutely say I will never again drink at the rate I was. I'm not going back there. Things can be so much better.
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